Every once in a while, I wake up on the wrong side of the bed. I don't know why it happens, maybe it's the day that has to be bad so all the other days seem better in comparison. Whatever the reason, I lay there thinking of the numerous reasons to just stay in bed -- it's warm, it's quiet, you don't have to go to work and sit in front of a computer for 8 hours relentlessly typing and making up billing descriptions -- but my job looms over my head and I know the longer I wait in bed, the later I'll be at work, the later I'll get home, and the later I'll be back in my cozy bed. Then I think about this cycle and realize how monotonous my life can get. And I try to think of something, anything that I can do to spice it up. Everything costs money... and since I haven't received my annual raise yet (will i ever?), I know it's not feasible to buy a round trip ticket to my sister's house and take a week's vacation. What good is the vacation when you know that you have to wake up and go back to this glorified monkey job, anyway?
If I can do anything I wanted right now with no consequences, it would be...
I really hope my answer isn't "getting back in bed" but it seems to be what I'm thinking about. I would want to be somewhere where I don't have to think about everything that has to be fixed. Maybe I have to accept that I will have always have a to-do list a mile long and that being stable isn't about having it all done, but being able to manage it without it getting in the way of living. Which clearly I'm not good at. Maybe for lunch I'll take myself on a nice little walk somewhere and get out of this typical common day rut.
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